{"id":10134,"date":"2022-08-15T08:00:55","date_gmt":"2022-08-15T12:00:55","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/trainchurchleaders.com\/practicum\/?p=10134"},"modified":"2025-06-03T15:10:56","modified_gmt":"2025-06-03T19:10:56","slug":"conflict-pray-with-the-right-motives","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/trainchurchleaders.com\/practicum\/conflict-pray-with-the-right-motives.htm","title":{"rendered":"To Rise Above Conflict, Pray with the Right Motives"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"Pray
\nVarying opinions can lead to a healthy tension as we struggle to arrive at the best decisions. If, however, those disagreements are fueled by selfish ambitions, the conflict tends to spiral into an unhealthy situation. To rise above conflict we need God’s help<\/a> but even our prayers will be tainted if we do not pray with the right motives.<\/p>\n

Cause of Conflict Affects How We Pray<\/h2>\n

Since “the Lord’s servant must not be quarrelsome” (2 Tim. 2:24; 1 Tim. 3:2-3), conflict with “fights and quarrels” (James 4:1) cannot be viewed as healthy conflict but rather as human worldliness (1 Cor. 3:3). When disagreements turn verbally combative and unkind, then our old human nature has surfaced with its “desires that battle within” (James 4:1).<\/p>\n

That kind of heart attitude and motivation often keeps us from praying. We may not even ask God for help (James 4:2) as we’re attempting to push our own agenda, not His. If we do pray, it’s often out of habit, to keep up appearances, or to try to arm-twist God into answering how we desire. Then, when conflict moves from bad to worse, perhaps with division looming, we wonder why God didn’t answer our prayers. Based on James 4:3, we should not be surprised. — “When you ask, you do not receive, because you ask with wrong motives …”<\/em><\/p>\n

Pray with the Right Motives to Get God’s Help Rising Above Conflict<\/h2>\n

A few verses later, in James 4, we read about the help God will give us to rise above — mega grace (James 4:3)<\/em>. Since God “opposes the proud but shows favor to the humble” then we need the humility to admit that perhaps our ways are not always right, that we don’t always know what’s best. If we don’t get to that point, we open the door to the devil to come in and reap havoc. To keep that from happening, we need to submit ourselves to God (James 4:7). We pray, “not my will, but yours be done” (Lk. 22:42). We admit that His ways are best, saying “Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name, your kingdom come, your will be done, on earth as it is in heaven” (Matt. 6:9-10).<\/p>\n

We will then “come near to God and He will come near” to us (James 4:8). When we humbly confess our sin, those ungodly desires or motives, “He is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness” (1 Jn. 1:9). Then we are ready to lead others to that same throne of grace (Heb. 4:16) so together we rise above conflict, striving together for His purposes, following His design and mission for the Church, all accomplished by the power He provides.<\/p>\n

For More on Praying, Go To: Prayer Resources for Church Leaders<\/a><\/p>\n

For More on Conflict, Go To: Conflict Management & Resolution Resources<\/a><\/p>\n

All Posts about Conflict Management:<\/h3>