Though conflict may be inevitable, God has equipped the Church with power to resolve conflict and bring reconciliation rather than division. That power will flow through people with spiritual gifting needed for that moment. As leaders, we don’t have to handle all these issues on our own. We can pull on other people’s spiritual gifts to help members of the Body rise above conflict.
Is it Biblical to Pull on Other People to Help with Conflict?
God does instruct us to go to the person directly BEFORE getting others involved (Matt. 5:23-24; 18:15-17). And, we must encourage people to follow God’s plan for conflict resolution. But, as we see in the Apostle Paul’s example, he pleaded, or strongly urged, two women in the church at Philippi to “be of the same mind in the Lord” but went on to ask someone else to get involved in helping the women (Phil. 4:2-3). While it doesn’t give gifting as a criteria for coming alongside of them, it does support pulling on other people in conflict.
Notice the word “all” in Romans 12:5 which says “so in Christ we, though many, form one body, and each member belongs to all the others”, suggesting that each and every one of us could possibly have a role as needed. We may be tempted to say “it’s not my place to get involved” but as members of the Body, we belong to “all” the others
Different Spiritual Gifts can be Useful in Conflict Resolution
Go back to verse 3 in Romans 12: “For by the grace given me I say to every one of you: Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgment, in accordance with the faith God has distributed to each of you.” — We must approach any involvement in the Body from a place of humility and grace, not as superior to others. Even our spiritual gifts are given to us on the basis of grace (Rom. 12:6). If we hop to the closing verses of Romans 12 we find a number of commands that would help prevent and/or resolve conflict. (Take time to read Romans 12:9-21.) Sandwiched between the beginning and end of this chapter, we find a list of the following spiritual gifts (Rom. 12:7-8).
For help with how the different spiritual gifts listed in Romans 12 and elsewhere can be pulled upon as needed in times of conflict, consider ordering the Ministry Handbook: Spiritual Gifts in Use. There you will also find suggestions for gifting that best fits 26 other issues and responsibilities a leader may face as well as gifts most typical for 16 broad ministry areas.
For help with how each of the leadership gifts tend to approach conflict, consider ordering the Balance in Church Leadership Based on Spiritual Gifting resource. This resource also looks at 14 other tasks and responsibilities of leaders in light of their gifts.
Find More Resources for These Topics:
All Posts about Conflict Management:
- Reason Conflict Management is an Important Skill for Leaders
- Not All Conflict is Bad
- A Litmus Test for Church Conflict
- Body Life Can Prevent Conflict
- Body Life Can Resolve Conflict
- Body Life Takes Responsibility in Conflict
- Conflict Hinders Fulfillment of the Great Commission
- The Right Mindset in Conflict
- The Right Reactions in Conflict
- Power of God Needed to Rise Above in Conflict
- To Rise Above Conflict, Go Back to the Gospel
- To Rise Above Conflict, Pray with the Right Motives
- To Rise Above Conflict, Rely on God’s Grace
- To Rise Above Conflict, Pull on People’s Spiritual Gifts
- To Rise Above Conflict, Follow God’s Word
- To Rise Above Conflict, Remember Who’s the Real Enemy
- Motivation to Rise Above Conflict
- Perspective and Power to Rise Above Conflict
- To Rise Above Conflict, Call on the Name of the Lord
- To Rise Above Conflict, Walk in the Spirit
- How Leadership Roles Affect Conflict Management